i regret to announce that the oc night at 1C has officially been cancelled for tonight, but will resume at the normal time (which is 10:00PM, molly) next week for the final episode of this season.

please join the johnson's instead at rudy's at 8:00PM for a going away party for justin and jana cofield.

okay, not only is today the day of jessica mae dunn's birth, but it is also the day of jessica mae dunn's birthday party!!

come to eat at bless your heart at 6:00 tonight. after fare that is both healthy and extremely yummy, we will move on to her band concert! come one! come all! this will be a night to remember!

first of all...blogger...seriously. you just aren't gonna work today? oh. okay. Apparently, neither am i.

second of all, i humbly apologize for my lack of posting. i know it's not easter anymore...and i know that i haven't posted in over a week...but hey...there have been worse offenses in our blogging community.

the older i get, the more i realize that i don't desire a social life. i ENJOY staying home alone...and i nearly dread social functions. i don't know the reason for this change, but i will go on record to say that i love you all, even if i just want to stay home when you call. it's nothing personal...for you. and so, in light of this new realization, i am going to post on things that have hindered my social life at one time or another...not counting my hermit like nature...

number 1. orange hair. it's true. and unfortunately, i have had orange hair more than once. this was my first experience with orange hair. my friends told me i looked like the girl from my so-called life...i knew it was hideous. this was before i discovered the resilience of my hair. i was told to wait 2 weeks until i dyed it again...and so wait 2 weeks i did....with flaming orange hair. and...i was in high school. i had to go to school every morning...and i still was on the worship team on sunday mornings....the bright lights reflecting off of my ORANGE hair. somehow, i didn't have a problem sporting my billy idol blonde hair...even though i should have. i guess that time i just believed the lies of my friends when they said, "it's cute!!" you're all liars.

number 2. zits. there's nothing like a good case of breakout to make you feel like you are the ugliest thing that ever lived. i have many times hid out at home watching proactive infommericals with phone in hand.

number 3. the curse of tami hernandez. fever blisters. of which i am sporting now. fever blisters are disgusting. no way around it. first they are huge white blisters...then they turn green and start to look like you have a booger on your lip...then comes the ooze and the gaping hole...and then they finally heal up. thank goodness i am on the finally healing up stage. just think...if i had never drank out of her coke...this wouldn't be on my list today.

number 4. white legs. this one is unavoidable. i am white. really white. blindingly white. if blindingly is a word, my legs are it's definition. summer comes around, and everyone is wearing their shorts with their tan legs. but not me. i'm the girl in jeans. and if i do wear shorts...i feel that i should automatically point out that i KNOW that my legs are really white...before anyone else can.

and there you have it. four good and stable reasons i have refused to hang out in the past.

and matt...a new post, just so you will come back...

ahem. i just wanted to share a little bit of my childhood with you all. here is a rap that was in our choir books in elementary school. we were always seriously stoked to get to "sing" it. feel free to sing along if you know it.

when i grow up,
i'll be so tall,
i'll get me a scholarship for basketball.
and if my head,
hits the sky,
i'll get me a job as a weather eye,
on tv.
under lights.
working nights,
that's me,
growing up.
outta sight!

and before anyone asks, i WILL rap this on request cause it's so totally gnarly!

so fresh and so clean proudly presents it's first play entitled:

"the day that jessi died"!!

(music swells, curtains open to find kim driving in her volkswagen thing, the top down, her long hair flowing in the wind. she is singing along with the music in her car. her flip phone rings and she scrambles to find it in her louie vuitton purse and still maintain conrol of the steering wheel.)

kim: hello?

adam: hey. have you talked to jessi today?

kim: no. why?

adam: dane just told me she didn't show up for dinner, and he hasn't talked to her all day. i was just wondering if you knew where she was.

kim: no. scary. i'll call around and let you know what i find out. and you do the same.

(she continues driving. thumbing through numbers in her phone and calling anyone who might know where jessi was. ring, ring, ring, ring, "hey, this is jessi. i can't come to my phone right now, so leave me a message and i'll call you back."

kim: hey jessi. this is kim. i heard that you didn't show up for dinner tonight, and you aren't answering your phone...everyone's starting to get a little freaked out. call me if you get this!

(heather. ring, ring, ring, "hey this is heather..." click. megan. ring, ring)

megan: hello?

kim: hey meg. this is kim. hey, have you talked to jessi today?

megan: no. i talked to her last night though.

kim: well, dane told adam she didn't come to dinner, and i haven't talked to her all day. i was just wondering if you knew where she was.

megan: no. just a second. i'll call you back.

kim: okay. bye. hmmm. misty. (ring, ring)

misty: herroo. (she is brushing her teeth and trying to talk at the same time).

kim: hey, have you talked to jessi yet about picking her up?

misty: no. why?

kim: she's m.i.a. no one can find her. she's not answering her phone and dane said she didn't show up for dinner.

misty: scary. i'll try to call her.

kim: okay, let me know if you find anything out. bye.

(thoughts of jessi's funeral begin to flash through kim's mind. "i told her not to take the bus!" she thought to herself. ring, ring)

kim: hello?

meg: hey. doesn't jessi's aunt live here in town? she was hanging out with her on sunday.

kim: sure. i don't know. (she is reading the article about her in the newest people magazine.)

meg: heather called jessi's r.a. to see if she was in her room. let me call you back.

kim: okay.

(by this time, kim is back at her apartment, only to find stephanie waiting for her. "i forgot she was coming over." she thought to herself.)

kim: how long have you been here?

steph: like 20 minutes.

kim: sorry. hey, jessi's m.i.a. have you talked to her by any chance?

steph: no. what happened?

kim: no ones talked to her all day. and she didn't show up for dinner.

steph: that's crazy. has anyone gone to her dorm room? yeah, heather called her r.a., and i think dane might have gone over there too...but i'm not sure.

(kim hears the bus turn the corner. becky has just gotten back from school. the stairs were obviously too much for becky's lungs to handle today. she enters, inhaler in hand.)

kim: jessi's missing.

becky: what? what's going on?

(puff, puff. squeeze, squeeze. these are the normal sounds of becky.)

kim: she didn't show up for dinner tonight, she's not answering her phone...

becky: she didn't sign on today either.

kim: i know. you told me earlier. (she flips her hair) i just keep picturing someone stealing her from the bus.

(ring, ring)

kim: hello?

misty: hey, i just talked to jessi.

kim: what??!!??

misty: she's in her dorm room.

kim: oh my gosh. thanks for calling. now i have to call everyone else and tell them that she's okay.

*************************************************************

there you have it. apparently, our lady of honor was volunteering her services at the blood drive. you can't get mad at a girl for that.