4:00 AM. it's still dark. i am glad that i slept in my clothes, anticipating this early awakening. bags are packed and ready to go, but i don't know that i am. this is so new. so different. i check my carry on, making sure that i have the essentials. tickets, cd player, batteries, tickets again. with my bases covered, i load the car. the city is so dead at this hour. it will be a different story in an hour and a half.

the airport is cold and the rising sun is bright. this new rule of being to the airport 2 hours in advance should not apply to those whose flight is at 7. i have a good hour and a half to sit here and watch people...wondering where they are going...how they are feeling. i can't quite tell how i feel. did i make the right decision?

the plane is empty, but fills up fast. i have never flown alone, and to be frank, that is exactly how i feel. alone. i have no one to tell that take off feels like a head rush, to point out the grand canyon and the sierra nevada. it's just me, my word searches, and dashboard confessional.

las vegas airport. it's a nice airport with random stores and moving sidewalks. just big enough to keep me entertained for the hour i have until my next flight.

this plane is the smallest thing i have ever been on. there are maybe 20 of us on this flight, and i am feeling very sick to my stomach. a two hour flight consumed by my efforts to not throw up in front of the other 19 passengers on the plane.

i finally arrive. 8 hours on a plane to step off onto hot tar. feels like home.